Merry Christmas

Today we celebrate the birth of a Baby. A Baby literally born in a stable, a cave, the lowliest of dwellings. But that Baby would one day do great miracles and works. And one day, He would die for the sins of the world. That Baby will one day rule over all the nations as eternal Lord and King.
Today we celebrate His humble birth. And we offer Him thanks for His great plan of salvation for us.

It's funny though, what society tells us Christmas is 'really about'. It's funny, the feelings they say we should feel, the traditions we should follow. It's funny how little of it has anything to do with the true Christmas Story. Most years I anticipate Christmas like no other day. I bake all sorts of treats, I count all the presents enough times to memorize their recipients by sight, I count down to midnight Christmas Eve like a small child would. But this year, it's different. Nothing seems that important this year. Not even the music or the lights or the movies, which I shamelessly admit are my favorite parts of the holiday season. It all feels far away and distant to me, but I'm starting to think maybe it's better. I've been doing more thinking on Jesus and His plan for us more than Santa and his gifts. It's still disappointing though. I wanted to be one of those people who is fully 44 and still has that childlike excitement. I never wanted to grow up...

I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day spending time with my family. Christmas Eve, we all played video games, which I lost. And we sang carols together around the piano. We watched "It's A Wonderful Life" which has to be one of my favorite traditions. And afterwords we watched "The Santa Clause" which is my favorite Christmas movie. I remember watching it every year since it came out. Soon after midnight, I went to sleep. I woke around 3, but not wanting to wake my parents or brother up, I stayed in bed, and listened to Christmas music. Just thinking, dreaming, remembering. I attempted to turn on the Christmas tree lights in the living room, but there were so many presents I couldn't find, let alone reach, the switch. I found a walking stick and poked around a bit with my right hand, while holding my cell phone in my left to use the light to find the switch. Thank goodness the neighbors were still asleep; I must have looked insane. Around 4, I convinced myself I was going to be tired, so I set an alarm for 5 and fell back asleep. When I woke up again, my mom had just turned on the Christmas tree lights, and was about to head back up to sleep. Think again. My brother woke up and wanted to get right into the present-opening. He woke up my dad, and by 6, we were all assembled in the living room, fresh-brewed coffee in hand, A Piano Christmas playing softly in the background (as is tradition) ready to open gifts. Being an organized group, we took turns unwrapping one-by-one. My parents went all-out with gifts this year. There were several signed "Santa" for both my brother and, surprisingly, me as well. There was also one signed "Relient K" and another from "Adam Young", but that's just my parents being creative as always.
I must admit though, I missed quite the party...Santa, Adam Young, the Relient K members, Mickey Mouse, Donald and Daisy Duck, and Demi Lovato all in the living room last night placing gifts underneath the tree...

Anyway, the best part of Christmas morning is watching the faces of everyone else as they open the gift I gave them. To know it brings them joy makes me feel warm on the inside. After the seemingly endless assortment of boxes and bows had been sorted out and their contents revealed, there were two more gifts. The one for my brother was a set of Garage Band Jam Packs (all you computer-savvy folks out there, I'm sorry but I have no idea what that is) and as he opened them, his expression reminded me of when he was little and had just discovered how to ride a bicycle. Then I received one last gift. A custom green Relient K PRS Se1 guitar. I literally was near to tears. It's the first actual guitar I've ever played, let alone the first one to call my own. I could never even dream of affording it myself. The worship leader at church lent an old amplifier to me until I could purchase my own (if you're reading this, thanks so much, Ethan!) so I spent near two hours jamming out rather badly to each and every song I could think of to play. It was amazing.
My brother also opened New Super Mario Brothers Wii or something like that. The four of us played that for hours this afternoon. My brother's the only very good gamer in the family, but it was a fun, laughter-filled experience I'll never forget. We also read The Christmas Story, which is a childrens adaptation of Luke 2. We've read it every year since I was 2 years old.
It brought back that rush of nostalgia, and for the first time, I felt like it really was Christmas again.

Today, we celebrate the birth of a Baby. You may celebrate by reading from Scripture, singing carols, exchanging gifts, or simply spending time with family and those you love. But however you do it, keep Jesus at the center.

"And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
'Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.'"

Merry Christmas,
~Lola

A Breath Of Winter Air

Dear Bloggers,
We are gathered here today in memory of this blog, who died of neglect and choked to death on the accumulated dust. It was a faithful blog, always letting me ramble, never judging me for failing in my use of markup, and very rarely did it ever mess up and post multiple times.
So sorry about all that.

Things here were so...indescribable. Ever since my cousin arrived, things got insanely busy. Between my studies, his trying to adjust to a new sleep schedule, trying to show him America in 4 weeks, the holidays, and the church Christmas program, it's been hard to get a breath in.

My cousin was not what I expected. I somehow thought he'd be a grown-up Christopher Robin. Prim and proper and slightly boring. I was far off in my assumption. He was exciting, and fun to be around, and made peanut butter no bake cookies. He played video games (it's been months since I had played video games), board games, helped me with my guitar, decorated for Christmas, and made gingerbread cookies with me. It's funny how you can not meet someone your entire life, and after a month cry so much when you say goodbye. He says he'll come back to visit again next year. He has to. He didn't see our town's giant plastic mouse on this visit.

The church Christmas program is next Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I'm singing in the choir. I get to hit a high G, which is challenging, but fun nonetheless. I like it. I'm a second soprano, so I don't have the hardest parts. And I love singing. The only thing I don't like is the people in the choir. The director is married to the first soprano (who I swear could sing opera) so she gets solos. She's friends with this alto (who I extremely dislike because she is so self-centered [and I have to stand behind her....I contemplated the distance between my choir folder and her head last week...but then I decided that would be childish]) she's friends with her so the alto gets solos too. And the alto is friends with this other alto who is absolutely horrible. She literally insults everybody to their face, and then turns around and smiles sweetly and leads worship Sundays. But I'm complaining. I'm not in choir for socializing, I'm in it to spread the good news of Christmas, so I should keep that as my goal and not get distracted by judging others.

Thanksgiving was fun. My whole family made it with Phil a week early. Then a week later on the actual day, we watched the parade, then went to the Pastor's house and played games and ate the actual dinner. That was enjoyable.

The day after, I had to wake up early. Not for sales, but to get Phil to the airport for his early morning flight. Along the way we stopped and did go shopping as soon as Jo-Ann Fabrics opened. A particular item was $200 off. We proudly drove away with the last one in the whole store. After dropping Phil off at the airport, I went to the mall. I needed a shirt for the Christmas program, but I ended up only finding one and it was far too expensive. I wanted to go to Hot Topic to get some new arm warmers, but it was so crowded that I decided it could wait for that. The only Black Friday excitement I ran into was the front window of Macy's was shattered. I'm not sure how or why, but it was. And there were police and caution tape. I think it was a mannequin that got pushed through it, but I heard people saying it was a person. But that's how rumors begin, so I would rather just leave it at a mannequin. Less violent.

It's been a week since then. Life's finally slowing down. Yesterday the first few snowflakes fell softly. By last night there were two inches of snow on the ground. I went out on the front porch to turn off the Christmas lights, and paused for a breath of winter air.
I love Christmas time.

So, I promise I'll make this thing live again. There's magic in the air, something exciting is bound to happen.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Virtual Funerals
~Lola

The Endless Dull

Fall has come to my little corner of the world. With it, it's brought the gloomy dull of a dead autumn. The leaves were only beginning to transform into fiery glimmers of golden ochre when a sudden rainstorm left the trees empty of all but a few straggling survivors.

It's also brought a lifeless shade of dull to my days. There is little to capture my interest, and the endless hours seem to drag by, pulling me with them into silent solemnity.

My only thought to remedy all this is to focus on the things I have done lately. So I'll share them on here.

My cousin is a flight attendant in Dubai. He gets a month off, so he's coming to live here. I gave him my room. I moved a bed into the attic. Which is fine. It's like a little piece of the world all to myself. Not that my room wasn't, but I guess it's just different. He's great though. He's originally from Australia, and I had never met him until last night, but he has the best accent. The four-hour drive home from the airport was entertaining to say the least. Anyway, he's still adjusting to the fact that it's 11 hours in the past here compared to Dubai, so he's been sleeping all day so far. I can't imagine time traveling like that. I'd probably sleep an entire week.

I've felt very far from everybody lately. I suppose that's normal, but it still makes me feel strange. As far as friends go, one's busy with school, another gone for 3 weeks to Canada, another just hasn't spoken to me much. Somehow I think he's mad at me, but I wouldn't know since we haven't talked. I guess I should just move on because 'I have better things to do' but to be honest, I really don't have better things to do. Except study, but I do that anyway. I don't know. I suppose you could just say I'm lonely.

I also made a YouTube account. I bought a new digital video camera last night. I intend to make video blogs. I do not, however, intend to show them to you. If you get bored enough, you'll find them and you'll recognize my channel by the colors and description, as they match my page here. It should be interesting to say the least. I'll probably get alot of rude comments as is the norm with that silly website, but I don't really care what they say.

So that's my life. Talking about it actually does seem to make it seem a bit more lively. Maybe it's just me who feels so dead...

Here's to Peace, Love, & Fall
~Lola

Recovery

So today I woke up around 6:00. I had an 8:00 appointment. To get all my wisdom teeth removed. I wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything past midnight last night, which may sound simple to most people, but I'm hypoglycemic, so without sugar in my blood, I could potentially throw up, pass out, or go into a lethargic state. So I was up most of last night worrying, imagining the worst case scenarios that could occur on the hour drive to the oral surgeon. The rest of last night was spent dreaming those scenarios through with the ever present help of the Pevensie children, the Chinese mafia, and Matt Hoopes. My dreams are always like that though.

Anyway, all my worries were for nothing. I didn't pass out on the way there, I didn't die of thirst, and the Chinese mafia did not shoot a hole through the back windshield.

At the dentist, things went okay. I very calmly allowed them to put oxygen through my nose, I barely squinted when they started my IV. I smiled politely when they had to remove it and start it again. After they put me under the influence of the anesthetic, I don't remember much. Somewhere the corner of my consciousness was aware that they were talking. I could hear the conversation. One of the assistants was going to a concert with her daughter next Friday. The other assistant said I had some of the longest eyelashes she'd ever seen. The Doctor reminisced about his days on the cheer squad at high school when someone brought up the school color change taking place next year.

The next thing I remember was waking up in the recovery room, mouth stuffed full of gauze. I couldn't swallow - that scared me. One of the assistants helped change the gauze a few different times before I was released and free to go home. Due to the fact I was still under the influence of the anesthetic, my mom drove me home. On the way I got a milkshake from Wendy's but I spilled most of it since I couldn't feel anything.

The nurse said the medication I'm on has a few psychological side effects. It's good to know the fact that I keep bursting into tears for no reason at least has some explanation. The numbness is wearing off, and now all that's left senseless is a bit of the left side of my mouth. My mouth still tastes like blood, and I'm told that it will continue to bleed off and on for the next two days.

I'm recovering though. I have knitting to keep me busy, I have Relient K to listen to, and I have my friends to type to when it hurts to talk. I'll be okay. Recovering might be a bit long, but once it's done, I'll be back to my normal everyday life where the biggest adventure is choir practice on Sundays.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Recovery
~Lola

The Post With No Clever Name

I can't think of a title to fit today's post. Not one that's been done before.

Lately I've not quite been myself. Not because of being sick or anything. More because of certain situations. It seems anymore life is just falling into pitfall after pitfall for me. The latest one I can't seem to get out of. I feel like it's pulling me away to becoming someone else that I don't want to be. It's been bringing me down emotionally for sure, but even physically - I can hardly sleep at night because it's been invading my dreams. I've been a bit of a wreck until yesterday.

Last night I got to talk to PJ/ for a few hours. He's one of those friends you know you're blessed to have - the ones who inspire you to be a better person. We stayed up half the night on MSN like we always used to. For a while, everything was how it always was. After we said goodnight around 3 in the morning, I lay awake thinking for a while.

I'm sick of lying. Sick of feeling nervous. Sick of all the drama.
So I've made up my mind that I'm not going back to it all this time. I want to be the way I used to be a year ago where nothing could ever bring me down and I didn't have any cares. And so far today, it's gone pretty well I'd say.

Forget And Not Slow Down came in the mail the other day. I'll post a review for you guys in a few days.

Here's To Peace, Love, & Escaping
~Lola

If You Were A Beautiful Sound In The Echoes All Around, Then I'd Be Your Harmony <3

So, today I've decided to blog again. Mostly about Owl City.

The 23 year old's music has stolen my heart and the top 5 most played songs on my Zune. Well, no, first is still So Simple by Stacie Oricco, and I still don't know how that's possible. But, anyway, Owl City is my new obsession and I've added Adam Young (Owl City's super-shy real-life alter ego) to the list of the stalked with John Warne and Matt Thiessen (and to a lesser extent, James Marsden). Anyway, all the sugar-sweet technopop music's gotten to my head, and in my head, therefore I have created a little piano video to his song "Vanilla Twilight". If anybody comments on this asking for it, I'll gladly send you the video. I don't feel like posting it simply because it's too personal. From it, you would discover that my favorite hoodie is orange, I have really small hands, I wear dark nail polish, and my hair is brown. And the fact that I have a piano at my house. And that I can't play the piano worth a penny.

In other news...there isn't really any other news. Life's just going at it's normal pace. Christmas will soon be here. I'd better start shopping. Black Friday may be the start for some people, but I prefer it to be my deadline. It's already 43 outside during the day. Perfect weather for fingerless gloves.

Forget And Not Slow Down has shipped as of yesterday morning. I can't wait for the moment of joyous rapture as I tear open the cellophane wrapping. It will be glorious. I got the poster pre-order option. With my name on it. That should be nice to hang up somewhere prominent.

Well, I'd better get back to my somewhat boring day.

Here's To Peace, Love, & Citrus Constellations
~Lola

When It Rains, It Pours, But When It Doesn't...

"drought n. 1. A long period of abnormally low rainfall, especially one that adversely affects growing or living conditions"

Let's be literal for just a minute.
Drought is when it doesn't rain for a long time. Crops go bad, the flowers die, grass goes brown, and things get a thin film of dust. We're currently in one. The corn already got harvested around here, most of the flowers in the garden are already dead, and the grass going brown just means I won't have to mow it for a while. The dust, I must say, can be quite annoying. I keep thinking that maybe I should write "Wash Me" on the back window of the car. Maybe some nice person will lend me $5 so it can go through one of those automatic fluoride wash places that make your car smell like toothpaste.

But the point is, it's a drought. It's a gradual thing that isn't good, but life adjusts around it.

Now, they don't expect this drought to last much longer. They expect rain every day next week. They already predict flash flood warnings. The farmers let out a sigh of relief, my mom can sleep at night knowing her mums will survive, the grass will have one last breath of green before fall, everybody who will get stuck behind me in traffic couldn't be happier, and I can't wait to fall asleep listening to the sound of the rain hitting the rooftops. Even if it floods, our town happens to be on a hill, so the most that will happen is a little water will be running down the streets.

Point is, floods happen overnight and life can't adjust fast enough to keep up. When it rains, it pours.

Let's be figurative now.

Lately, for me at least, life's been a really long drought. Things have been going slowly downhill, but life's been adjusting to it.
But that's just not how life works, is it?
Seemingly out of nowhere, as of five days ago, the rain of life has begun to fall and it hasn't stopped yet. The raindrops hit the ground accompanied by the soft echo of adventure. Some things happening aren't exactly appreciated, but they're outnumbered by the outrageous number of happy occurrences. When it rains, it pours, it really does, and it's brought me back to life again.

Now if only the real rain would fall already. I'm about ready for everything else to come back to life too.

Here's To Peace, Love, & Listening To The Rain Fall
~Lola

Road Trip..Again

Thankfully not a long one. Just to my grandparents' for a while. That was nice, I suppose. I never know what to say to them, so mostly I don't say anything.

On the way home, however, I had the chance to go to Chicago again.

So far it's been great! There was this great little Brazilian restaurant where they served a bunch of rare foods at a salad bar and then endless various types of rotisserie meat. But they had endless cunapes as well, which was good because I was planning on having to make them tomorrow night. Now I'm off the hook.

The hotel I'm at is 5-star. Right off the Magnificent Mile. So that's fun. I think I'll take a walk down there tonight.

Life's still not very exciting. Just figured you needed an update though.

Here's to Peace, Love & Road Trips,
~ Lola

I'm Going To Make An Entire Post About Relient K

Come on, you know I can do it without even trying. But, I won't. I'll just share a little about Relient K and more about my life, since that's what blogs are supposed to be about, right?

So, today I reached a new level of happy. I called it Relient K Happy. Why? Cause it was brought about by this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PSQ6JALkZs

and the track list, and the "I Don't Need A Soul (To Hold)" lyrics. The world is such a happy place today. But, as promised, this post will not be all about Relient K.

See, I got the song from my friend Ike, who I hadn't heard from in over a year and a half. It was so unexpectedly pleasant to hear from him again, but it wasn't how I expected. See, I met him as "ikethespecial" on an Animal Crossing site. He and I talked about Relient K mostly, and he was probably one of my nicest friends on there. But then he left...
Well today I get followed on Twitter by "relientike" Suspicious? Quite. Being the person who always speaks her mind, I simply asked him flat-out if he was ikethespecial. He said he was, but (here's the surprising part) he only added me because my username has "relientk" in it. He doesn't even remember that we were ever friends! Not that he meant it rudely or anything, but it looks as if we'll be starting at ground zero in this friendship...

Speaking of friends, I lost one a few days ago. He was one of my best friends too. See, this is how it goes in my world. I have PJ/, who you all remember from the post I put out on his birthday. He's my random, funny, sweetheart of a friend who I consider closest. Then I have Rhett, who is older than me, and probably the smartest person I know. He's really accepting, a bit sarcastic, but totally the sort of friend everybody would want. And then there was Roux. He was...just like me. Everything I needed, he was there for. We laughed, we cried, we watched chick flicks and bashed boys when they broke our hearts...until two days ago. That was the day he left. Left for Nevada, told me we couldn't be friends anymore - swore it hurt him worse than it hurt me. I cried. Alot. But let's not go there. Why? Because, as Matt Thiessen puts it,

"The sun still burns the shadows out, and there's nothing to complain about now"

So, I'm going to take his other advice, and forget about all this and keep on going. Why, because I've got PJ/ and Rhett on one hand, and on the other I have my new friend who, for all practical purposes, has friendship amnesia. The world's still spinning, and Relient K's new CD comes out in 45 days.

That's alot to be happy about!

Here's to Peace, Love & Being Relient K Happy
~Lola

P.S. Did you notice Relient K was mentioned in each topic? I guess I failed at not making the entire post about Relient K. ha ha

I Guess I Really Should Update

Right? I mean it's been, what, 18 days? In blog-terms, that's pretty much a lifetime.
There's just not been anything interesting to blog about. So this is going to be really boring. I apologize.

- I pre-ordered TFK's new CD and so should you.
http://tfk.skyroo.com/se/view/music/index.html

- Jon Schneck has taken to Rubik's Cube-ing to pass the time since the paper toss tournament was ended by MatTy. New podcast of said cubing might make you laugh. It made me laugh for sure.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zni7ovRgIxg

- I've taken up knitting. No, I'm not 80. It's actually sorta relaxing and maybe even fun. I'm working on a special Christmas present for my best friend. It should turn out pretty sweet if I can get it to him. That's the hard part. haha

- Speaking of friends, remember back to how my birthday was most likely the last time I'd see alot of my friends? For a while, I thought that might've been wrong. But it wasn't. I told my friends I wasn't going back to dance this year and even the one who knows me better than probably anyone else in real life won't speak to me anymore. I keep telling myself I don't care, but deep down I do, I just don't want to think about it.

- I got my hair cut. I have bangs now. But they need straightening since my perm experiment made them look somewhat ridiculous. But straightened they look pretty okay, I think. The rest of my hair is just shorter.

- I went to a Demi Lovato concert last night. I know, I know, kid music. Pop. Everything I don't listen to. But I didn't really go for me, see, my brother is convinced that he's going to marry Demi someday since she is his age and all. So we went to the state fair and I took him to the Demi concert. We had pretty good seats right up by the front, so that was fun. I mean, concerts are fun no matter who they are, right? I did like it and my brother says he'll send me her songs for Zunii. I hope he remembers to do that...

I told you I haven't been up to much, and I really was telling the truth...but I guess that's just how summer is sometimes. Soon enough, fall will come, and then winter. Well, no, I take that back. The days until September 8th seem to be dragging. So it's not soon, but fall will come eventually. haha

Well, anyway, I've rambled too long for now.

Here's to Peace, Love & Rubik's Cubes That Look Like Daisies
~Lola

So I Really Need To Stop Procrastinating...

Last weekend was Ignite in Chicago. I've been stalling blogging about it because there's so much to say...I guess I'll just start at the beginning and when I get to the end, I'll stop.

So I love Chicago. Just for the record. I intend to live there someday. Not sure if I will, but I really hope to. Anyway, the trip there was fun. After checking into the hotel around 11 in the morning, we got pizza at Giordano's. Oh I forgot to say the car got a flat tire. It got fixed though during lunch. Anyway, we left straight from the pizza restaurant to the concert. We missed the first few bands, but we didn't know of them, so it worked out that we got to the baseball stadium just as Fireflight started their set.

After Fireflight came Disciple; I'm not very into music that loud, so I went to wait in a 30-minute line to meet Fireflight.

After that came Matthew West. Not my style either.

Then came Mark Schultz. I regret to say that I like him a whole lot less after seeing him live. He had no...no passion for what he was playing and looked extremely bored the whole time. And you had to pay if you wanted to meet him. Needless to say, I wasn't paying a penny to meet him, even though I used to love his music.

After him came Jeremy Camp. Still not quite my style, but he was very good and afterwards, when I met him, he was extremely nice.

Then came TobyMac. His show was quite flashy, but very entertaining. We had to leave early though, since his show ran later than scheduled.

The second day was the one I was more interested in. We got the stadium as Tenth Avenue North was just doing their sound check. I got to meet some of the bands that had played earlier that day, simply because they looked so sad sitting at their table, Sharpies in hand, with nobody wanting to meet them. They were very nice though.

After Tenth Avenue North, I went up to the front to go see KJ-52. He was definitely fun to hear. Afterwards, my amazing brother had waited in line the entire show for me to meet KJ since the lines were nearly 100 people long before the end of the rapper's set. So I got to meet KJ, but only for about 30 seconds and when my brother tried to get a picture of me with him, the two annoying girls ahead of us jumped in right in front of me. I did happen to get a really cool picture of him though.

After KJ came BarlowGirl. I'm really sorry to anyone out there who loves them, but BarlowGirl is one of those bands I just can't stand. My brother got to meet them, but I didn't even pay attention to their set.

After BarlowGirl came Family Force 5. Now, my relationship with their music is a bit love/hate. Sometimes I love it, but most of the time, it gets on my nerves. They're still 6th on my list of favorite bands though, and luckily, that day I was in the "love" mode. They're very into the show of it all, but they're also very good at what they do, so it was a great set, and I really liked it! My brother was once again amazing (and he hates them anyway haha) so he waited at the beginning of their line for me. I think it might have been the most exciting [non-Relient K] moment of the entire trip when I finally got to the table to meet them. For this one, I do have a picture. Well, sorta.

They didn't allow pictures with the band, so I had to take a picture of the band. [fangirl moment] See?? That's Chappy right across that table!!! :DDD[/moment] I got Dance or Die signed. The strange security guard person wearing a suit and tie tried to make them sign the back. I flipped it over when he wasn't looking so they signed the front.

During all this waiting in line and getting CD's signed by FF5, I missed the first two songs of Skillet. Fortunately, that's all I missed. Their show was quite amazing and I loved it! They sang pretty much all the best songs from Comatose (besides "Falling Inside The Black"...) and both their new songs. I wanted to pre-order their CD, but by the time I reached their booth they'd sold out of pre-order cards. I guess that's what the internet's for.

After Skillet, came the undisputed best part of the entire weekend - Relient K! Forgive the unusually frequent use of exclamation points throughout this paragraph. They started off the show with one of my favorite songs, "Chapstick, Chapped Lips, and Things Like Chemistry" They played some of what I consider their best songs, like "There Was No Thief" and "I Need You" Unfortunately, they only played one of their new songs, "Forget And Not Slow Down", which I gladly know all the words to, thanks to Matt Thiessen posting the official ones! I was right up near the front of the stage for their show and it was amazing! I got 29 pictures of the band, and if anybody leaves a comment asking for it, I'd be glad to send the link to the album.

They didn't meet the fans, so I didn't get my drawing signed, or my FiveScore cover signed, or my Mmhmm cover signed, or my hat signed, or anything signed for that matter. I was also going to do the big reveal of the first picture of me ever on this blog thing, but I didn't even get a picture with them, so that didn't pan out. Guess you'll just have to wait to know what I look like until I finally do get a picture with John Warne...

After Relient K came Third Day. They're not my favorite band (that would be Relient K) but they are pretty good. We had to leave halfway through their show though since we only were staying the one night in the hotel, and had to drive home straight from the concert. The whole trip home, I spent texting my best friend which was fun. I think I'm finally getting faster with the whole "qwerty keypad" thing. Not as fast as I can type on Lappy, but maybe someday. haha

So that's the update. It was an amazing weekend, and I highly recommend you see the following bands live: Relient K, Skillet, Family Force 5, TobyMac, and KJ-52.

Here's to Peace, Love & Chicago-Style Pizza.

~Lola

Finally Getting Back

It's been over a week since I got back from Wyoming, and I haven't really been the same since the trip. But today, I think I'm finally getting back to my old routines. FiveScore and Seven Years Ago is back on shuffle, I actually woke up instead of sleeping until 9:00, I feel like maybe I'm alive again instead of just making it from morning to night. Funny, I finally get back into routine the day before I leave again. But this trip won't change me. Much. If it does, I'll just come back even more of a fangirl, which isn't all too bad. For me.

I looked back this morning and wondered what exactly brought about the sudden change back. I didn't look for long until I found the reason. For about a week before my trip (until apparently a week after) I've been spending the last five minutes of each day praying. My prayers usually included a request for forgiveness, thanking God for my family and my friends, and then I'd drift off to dreams. Last night I stopped and realized just how far away from God that really had made me. So last night I did something different. I spent over thirty minutes in prayer as opposed to five. And today, I finally feel alive again.

If you've been following my logic, you may come to the conclusion that prayer is what makes me a fangirl. That's not exactly the direction I was trying to go with this. I think what I'm trying to say by all this is that when I'm closer to God, I'm closer to being myself. I'm closer to being a happy, somewhat cynical, but mostly happy individual.

So anyone out there who's just not quite feeling like yourself, maybe all you need is some extra time alone with God. Who knows, the next day you could wake up more alive too!

Here's to Peace, Love & Getting Back,

~Lola

Gardening

"If friends were flowers, I'd pick you."

An anonymous person said that. It's a cute phrase. But the problem with friends is that sometimes you don't quite know what you're picking.

Some people are like wildflowers - you pick them and the next day they're dead. Now you're friends won't be dead the day after you meet them (I seriously hope) but soon they'll simply lose interest in you and move on to the next new person.

Some people are like dandelions - they're nice for a while, but when the wind blows, they'll be gone leaving you to go through the hard times on your own.

Some people are like thistles - they'll be your friend, but rest assured you'll never be able to be very close with them. They intend to keep everyone at a distance, whether or not they're aware of it.

Some people are like roses - they may seem wonderful, but they'll hurt you without a backward glance. Because they were such good friends before, many times you may try again, but every time without fail, you'll be caught on a thorn.

The flower garden may sound like a scary place to have to pick from, but there's one breed of flower to look for - the daisies. They're not all that rare, but quite often unnoticed. They may not look like much at first glance, but they're the best friends you can find. They'll stick with you when the going gets rough and they'll last alot longer than other types of friends.

So be careful not to overlook the daisies - they tend to make the most beautiful bouquets!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm guessing you're probably wondering what this blog post has to actually do with my blog. Fact is, it really has nothing to do with it. I found this whole thing typed up in Microsoft Word from a few months ago and felt like posting it up here. I guess there's really nothing better I could've posted today since there's really nothing interesting going on in my life. Just working on my sewing project. Off and on I've been practicing my piano, but the only thing coming to mind to play is "Fuzzy Blue Lights" and it's already stuck deep enough in my head so it's the last thing I want to play. I'd find something fun about Relient K to ramble about on here, but lately I've just not been that into them for some reason, so that's not an option. So that's why I chose gardening. Maybe it helped someone; maybe it didn't; maybe I'm just a bit out of it today.

Here's to Peace, Love & Flowers
~Lola

Oh, Home On The Range!

So my trip is over and done. So very happy, so very sad, and at the same time, very lost in the middle of a rushing world.

I'm happy to be back in touch with my Twitter (and blog and FaceBook and best friend and Relient K forums), happy to be reunited with Zunii, and so happy to see a flushing toilet that I could literally cry.

I'm sad to have left so soon, because I know that I will most likely not see many of my family members who I hadn't seen for years now, for even more years to come. This morning was full of teary goodbyes and hugs that refused to let go. Even from the teenage boys of the family. We all promised to play Farm Town on FaceBook, though, so I think we'll survive the years. If my farm animals survive my virtual gaming skills.

I'm also lost - so lost. I thought I had alot of my life figured out. I thought I knew exactly where I wanted to live, what I wanted to do, and who my role models were; being out in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do but think changed a few things. I think. The first thing that struck me that I didn't expect was the change in my cousins. I remember days when we would throw silly pool parties in their backyard and listen to country music at unsafe levels when our parents were out to dinner. Since then their family has crumbled and now I can't even see anything I once knew in any of them. At first I thought it was sad but now I'm not so sure it isn't a good thing... The next few uncertainties are still just that - uncertain. I'll probably get back around to those at a time when I'm running on more than 3 hours of sleep.

I will now proceed to create a mini blog post for the trip. I'll go day - by - day and try to explain things.

Day 1 - The Kelley House

Day one was mostly driving. Fun in one of those "I'm probably going to die if I have to hear this Beyonce song again" ways. I have never been more thankful for my headphones and more sorry to not have brought along Zunii.
The trip took most of the day and once we arrived at the house of my mom's sister, all I wanted was to sleep. Unfortunately, she is a dedicated video game fanatic, so instead I played Super Smash Brothers Melee with her for a few hours. I'll admit it was fun, but I was more than ready when she told me to get some sleep.

Day 2 - Strawberry Hill

Day two was Independence Day. We began the day riding on a float for a local karate school. I should probably back up and say that my 8 cousins from Texas showed up with their parents at 4 that morning. I was too unconscious to wake up, but then again, they were asleep within 5 minutes since their drive was 20 hours. Anyway, we all rode the float, even though none of us 1] live there or 2] do karate. It was fun I suppose. Afterwards we made the 2 hour trek to Strawberry Hill, the ranch owned by my grandparents.

And so the fun began.

All the females in the family were required to unload the two trailer-campers and motor home full of food. All the males were sent to retrieve the two port-a-potties (I feel like I'm 2 when I say that) that we would use for the days to come.

There were charcoal pits dug, tents set up (ours was an authentic Civil War tent. with no floor.), and cell phone batteries dying looking for service. It was a fun day filled with catching up with now-grown-up cousins and planning the following week. There was a strange lack of pyrotechnics, but I didn't really care all too much.

Day 3 and 4 - Rain

Who knew it rained so much in Wyoming? You would've thought we were in Washington state or something. It poured the entire third afternoon dashing our team's hopes in the cast-iron-cookoff. I suppose I should mention that part of things. The two of my mom's siblings living in Texas teamed up against my mom and her sister (who is from Wyoming) to make two cast-iron meals - breakfast and dinner. South made breakfast that day, but North's dinner was canceled due to rain. Not too fun, but it was alright I guess.

Day four was frightening. My mom and her sister went into town to feed her goats and chickens, and ended up taking the entire day due to tornado watches. Do you know how frightening it is to be told there's a tornado watch coming your way and all you have to hide in are port-a-potties and RV campers? It rained the entire day, and that night no word came from my mom or her sister. Being a firmly God-grounded family, all of us still at the ranch joined hands and sang hymns (and Christmas carols..haha) under the food tent. I cried. My cousin Savannah cried. Pretty much all the women there cried. But we continued to sing for three hours until the storm subsided and the two sisters returned from their day-trip. Looking back at the entire week, that night was the best night I think I had.

Day 5 and 6 - We Like The Flavor of Hay

The last two official days of the trip were spent doing the task we even went to Wyoming for - haying. My grandparents have three horses so they made 1200 bales of hay for them. How's that for logic? Anyway, you might think "oh, haying. yeah, you pick up the little bales and put them on the trailer". At least that's what I thought. I guess I was standing too far away from the 'little bales' - each one weighs from 75 - 125 pounds. Needless to say my arms hurt. And my legs. And my hands. And pretty much everything else. I also got a second-degree sunburn on my nose. Not cool. Not cool at all.

Day five, North made breakfast and it went over almost as well as the South's. Seeing as how 70% of the voters were on the South team, it seems a bit biased, but nobody cared about the prizes - just the fun of the competition. South made supper and it was probably the most delicious Mexican food I've ever had. My mom's brother-in-law is half-Mexican so he knew all these awesome recipes so they picked enchilada lasagna. I still need to ask him for that recipe...

Day six North made supper. It took too long, so we ate it at 11 PM. It was baked radiatore and focaccia bread. We even played Dean Martin through the car stereo to add the ambiance. And still, we lost by 3 points...(365 to 368 isn't bad though, I'd say). In a complete state of awesomeness, the South defaulted and gave us the prize, which was $100 per cook. I knew I should've helped instead of going for a walk...

Day six's night was spent wonderfully. My brother, Savannah, her sister Charity, and I played Mexican Train dominoes for hours after everybody else went to bed. After that Charity retired to the awful little tent and the three of us spent even more hours talking. We stayed awake until dawn and then spray-painted eachothers' hair pink and lime green. And then everybody else woke up and we had the aforementioned teary goodbye.

And on Day seven, we came home.

If you read that, you have way to much time on your hands, but thank you for caring enough to read it. I should probably sleep. Since I only got any sleep in the car today. I'll blog again soon.

Here's to Peace, Love & Multi-Colored Hairspray
~ Lola

So This Is The Game Plan, Folks

Not much to say today, but I do have a few things that have transpired since the last update. I'll put them in a list.
- Relient K sang a new song at a concert. Forget And Not Slow Down. It's amazing.
- I was assigned to teach Sunday School for the summer
- Michael Jackson died
- I've finished the top of my dress

Now that I've caught you up, I'll get you a step ahead.

This next weekend I'm off to Wyoming for a week. A whole week. No internet, no Zune, just my cell phone. I'll be able to check my Twitter (/relientkfanatic), so if any of you feel the need to keep up with me or contact me while I'm gone, go ahead and use that.

The reason I'm saying all this even though I'll still be here for 7 days is that I have to finish my dress's skirt before the trip. Entirely. That alone will take up the entire day, let alone packing and working on my Sunday School lesson plans. So I probably will not be able to blog again until I get back. Not to worry, I'll tell you everything about the trip that's worth telling.

So that's the game plan for the next few days. After this the only big thing for the summer is Ignite which is the 18th-19th. I'll have much more news about that than I will about Wyoming. But I'll talk to you when I get back I suppose.

Here's to Peace, Love & Busy Days
~ Lola

P.S. Today's John Warne's birthday. He doesn't read my blog. But that's okay.
Happy Birthday, John Warne!! You rock!!

The Goldfish Technique

I went to the doctor's office recently. In the waiting room they had one of those big aquariums with two goldfish and some of those scarily strange white frogs in it. Their little red eyes glow and they look dead until they move...

But anyway, this isn't about the unnatural amphibians. This is about the goldfish. Did you ever notice how they're constantly opening and closing their mouths even when they aren't moving anywhere? It makes them look as if they're perpetually at a loss for words. They look silly as they stare at you, mouths opening in a timed pattern. But they're alive, aren't they? Unless they opened their mouths to inhale water, they wouldn't be able to get oxygen through their gills. I have a theory that many of the goldfish who end up floating above the water were only trying to be cooler than the rest.

Sometimes I think we're like that. We don't want to be any different or look silly in front of anybody; we end up dragging ourselves through a boring day-to-day existence - dead to what's known as really living. We need to breathe constantly, no matter how retarded we look while we do it. We need to do the unexpected, make life interesting, wake up the adventure that's asleep in all of us. That way we'll stay alive - really alive.

I believe the nurse thought I was rather insane as I was thinking all of this, smiling widely at the small fish across the glass. But now you know what goes through my mind in the doctor's waiting room.

Of course, all of this is highly suspect. The reason the goldfish die could be because the undead frogs sucked out their life juices while they slept.

Here's To Peace, Love & Aquariums
~ Lola

It's Like Letting Go Against My Will...

I woke up today wishing I was someone else. Someone with sandy blond hair and eyes that waver between brownish-gray and blue. Someone who talks with an accent and a different sense of humor. Someone who is my best friend's best friend.

For the past few month I've slowly watched my best friend be stolen away by this person. I've never personally talked to them and I'm sure s/he's very nice and isn't intentionally doing this, but it's happening none the less.

What used to be a promise of "best friends for life" has deteriorated to sharing the leftover time when I'm the only person still around. I love my friend more than I can say, but it's slowly becoming clear that they don't exactly care. I guess that's what this all comes down to - I've never had anybody tell me that they care, that I'm their very best friend, that they'll always be there for me. I would give anything for someone like that who won't let me down...

Here's to Peace, Love & Trying To Sleep When The Pillow's Too Wet.
~ Lola

P.S. I recently discovered that more people read this blog than I thought (thanks, everybody). So, to my best friend who now reads this, I'm sorry if writing this hurt you. I'm sorry I'm so selfish. Please don't be mad, but it's the only way I know how to tell you what I feel.

Excuse Me, I'm Looking For the ITCZ...

I'm sitting here with a pen and paper, ready to post something witty and interesting. But today, I've found that I have nothing to say.

I believe it stems from having nothing to do. Intermission may be nice for a while, but it can easily lead to the Horse Latitudes. The Horse Latitudes are an oceanic latitude where winds may suddenly die for hours, days - even weeks. Spanish merchant ships would then be forced to throw their cargo of wild horses overboard to conserve water for the crew to stay alive until the winds picked up. Not a pleasant history, and not a pleasant place to be.

Unfortunately, I think that's where I am. For the past week, I honestly have done nothing at all. I was planning on breaking the cycle and doing something fun like tennis today, but yesterday I was diagnosed with asthma so going outside at this time of year just won't work. But I'm not going to stop trying! The ITCZ is somewhere around here and I'm determined to find it. Maybe sewing my dress is a start in the right direction...

Here's to Peace, Love & Spanish Merchant Ships.
~ Lola

Allow Me A Few Moments To Be Myself

*This blog post is pretty much just my rambling on about Relient K. It's part of who I am, so please just excuse it if you find it odd. But, seriously, it is what this blog is named for after all.*

I just spent the last 20 minutes watching a "mini-mentary" of one girl's adventure following Relient K on their west coast tour. She got to go to 9 shows, hear snippets from their unreleased album early, and best of all hang out with each band member pretty much every day. Awesomest kind of adventure ever, if you ask me.

Today was a Relient K day for me. I've spent the afternoon following all the members' twitter posts and blogs, reorganized my picture album of them into seperate little folders for each member, and listened through the playlist of their concert nearly 4 times. The next item on the agenda is to draw a chibi-fied version of Matthew Hoopes with my tablet.

Obsessed? I figured you knew that by now...

I'm not sure if I've told you yet or not, but I'm going to see them again this summer. July 19th. I'm counting down days. The first concert of theirs I went to, I was unprepared. I wore normal clothes, took no CD for signing (I purchased a hard copy of FiveScore while there), and didn't go up to the mosh pit when only 10 pre-teen girls were standing up there. I also didn't have the forethought to wait by their bus for them to sign autographs. I'd heard they weren't signing but another person said they were and now I'll never know. It was the first time they ever played "Deathbed" at a concert, and I was the first person to have the video of it up on YouTube, but that's the only proof I was even there.

For this one, I'll be ready. My 'Life After Death And Taxes' jeans are in the wash to prepare for the use of a bleach-pen to make the words more readable since Sharpie seems to wash out of denim. I also have an official T-shirt of the band to wear, and a hat and messenger bag bearing their logo to finish out the ensemble. I plan to take my copy of FiveScore And Seven Years Ago and my drawing of the band for them to sign (and a Sharpie!) and even if it means missing part of another show (never been to a band festival, so I'm not sure how it works) I'm going to find them for pictures this time.

I wonder what they'll play? I wonder if their CD will have a release date by then? I wonder if Hoopes will have the flu again and not be able to sing very well?

And for the next few hours, you are very lucky to not be within earshot of me.

Here's to Peace, Love & Being A Fangirl Every Once In A While
~Lola

Intermission

Every ballet performance has more than one act. Between two such acts, there is a pause given for the dancers to take a break and prepare for the rest of the show. This pause is called intermission.
Here's a little "did you know" about intermissions. The only children's movie with intermission in it is 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang'. With good reason, too, since a straight 2 1/2 hours of confusing fairy tales and whiny children could grate on one's nerves.

But intermissions occur in more than performances and movies. Sometimes it can be a blissful pause in life between chaotic days. For me, my intermission begins today. I no longer have to prepare for our showcase which was pulled off with several backstage hitches that the audience never saw. I no longer must worry about due-dates for multi-page papers or study hereditary gene traits of pea plants.

The only thing on my mind anymore is the trip to Wyoming in July, Ignite Chicago, beginning work on my ballgown, perming my hair, and keeping up with the band members as Relient K works on a new CD...so maybe that is alot, but to me it's all very enjoyable and I'm quite pleased to have some structure to the endless days of summer.

I got my cast off on Tuesday, and the pain is all but gone. I can't play my guitar yet, but I will soon enough. <3

Here's to Peace, Love & Summer,
~Lola

A Moment For Quiet Memory

Today I received news that my Spanish teacher's daughter was killed in a car accident. A storm the previous night made the road slick and she lost control, running into a cement wall. I never personally had the chance to know her, but she was one of my brother's closest friends. He tells me she was a bright, cheery person who could bring a smile to anyone's face. She was planning to be a missionary to South America in the near future.

It's times like these that we want to ask why. Why does God call home those of us who seem to be on a path for His glory? It's also times like these that we need to simply follow without any questions. Sometimes it's to show us just how small each of our lives are. Sometimes it's to remind us of God's infinite power. Sometimes there is no apparent answer just yet. We must simply accept His plan and trust that those that are no longer present here, are present with Him.

She may no longer be here with us, but she won't be forgotten by those who knew her.

Here's to Peace, Love & Malarie
~ Lola

Here is the link to the news article for more information involving the accident:
http://www.pnj.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=200990526009

It Is NOT Called Running Away

I hate YouTube. I hope to be on American Idol someday. It's a dream. I think it's possible, I mean, people have said I sing nicely. So I thought, hey, maybe it'd be nice to get some constructive criticism. Unfortunately, the people on said site are either 1] naturally rude, 2] immature and annoying in real life as well, 3] took stupid pills, or maybe all three. They say comments like "ur ugly and i can sing wayyyy bettr than you. in fact my sister can sing better and shes 4".

I'm a bit quick-tempered, so my first response would be the following.

"Firstly, learn to type. Secondly, I'd love to see you actually be brave enough to put a video of yourself up for open comment. Thirdly, read the other comments. And lastly, use a bit of tact next time, jerk."

I'm sure there are alot of others out there who would say that too, or possibly even worse than that. But it's then that one must consider the consequences of said action. It would not affect the other person in the least, I'm positive. It would also bring you to their level. Tossing insult for insult accomplishes little. Most importantly, what kind of witness would that be?

The alternate route is much less rewarding at the moment, but will definitely make you feel better overall, and the best part is it leaves the other person totally confused. When someone says something totally rude and tactless, the proper response is as follows.

"No need to be quite so blunt, but thank you for your input. You might wish to be more careful how you word things. I enjoy singing, and still intend to pursue it, regardless of whether or not your four year old sister can sing better. God bless you, have a nice day. :)"

Trust me, they'll sit there trying to figure out why you're being nice to them for at least a good few minutes before writing you off as strange, and quite often leaving you alone. Plus, it'll make you sound far more mature, and at the end of the day, you will feel far better about what you said.

So even if it's hard to get the words out, get them out there and just walk away. Note that it's not running away -it's slow, deliberate walking.

In other news, I'm getting blond highlights in my hair today. Fun, fun!

Here's to Peace, Love, & Using Tact
~ Lola

P.S. I got inspiration for this post from recent comments on my YouTube videos and KJ-52's song "I Won't Ever Stop" Just in case you wanted to know that.

Long Days, Longer Nights, Waiting Makes the Time Go By...

In other words, I've been bored as of late. I'm waiting for the next 22 days to pass. Then I get my cast removed and can play my guitar again. In the unwanted break, I have been able to write two new songs so I can have something new to play at least.

I'm sorry I haven't written for a while. Our ballet showcase is next weekend and the dances are still being changed and two of the other dancers haven't been to class for a few weeks. We've been extending rehearsals and scheduling last minute run-throughs of our four dances. We took out the fifth one because we weren't prepared for it.

In my personal life, I've been doing quite a bit of drawing lately, both with my tablet and also with my drawing notebook. It's enjoyable, and I'm finding several new techniques, but I'm afraid I'm no good at drawing in the first place, so the techniques aren't going to do any good.

In even less related news, Relient K's new CD will be called "Forget And Not Slow Down", or at least that's what seems to be official. I'm slightly worried that I may not like it, simply because everybody seems to be changing their sound lately and they're the one band who definitely didn't need to change anything. If I in fact, don't like it, I'm in a strange predicament, because I just framed a 24x36 poster of them and put it up in my bedroom. Oh the things I spend birthday money on.

In yet less-on-topic news, I'm very close to finishing Phantom Hourglass. I almost got to the 5th level of the Ocean King's Temple before I got killed by a phantom. It's relatively hard to play with only one hand.

Now that I took you on a whirlwind trip through the last nine days of my life, I'll leave you to unscramble the randomness.

Here's To Peace, Love, & Catching Up
~Lola

I Refuse To Do The Limbo

I'm in pain. Not the deep emotional hurt that sometimes clouds my view, but the literal ache in my left wrist. So forgive any typos.

We defied the rules yesterday and went roller skating. The people who run the place are so far out of touch with reality that they didn't know what the swine flu was. It was a blast except for a few things. Firstly, one of my friends ditched me for playing a board game with her boyfriend. Secondly, of my song mix, the DJ played a total of 6 songs, preferring instead to play the chicken dance and the cha-cha slide. And thirdly, the limbo. I was determined to not do it. Who in their right mind would? Nobody in attendance could skate worth a gumdrop. But the DJ literally grabbed my arm and dragged me to the limbo bar and made me go under it. I let my weight slip back a bit and my feet started sliding out in front. To break my fall, I put out my left hand. Wrong move. I didn't cry, but it hurt like heck. Thank goodness it was at the end of the party. For the remainder of the night, I just put ice on it and moved on. I even slept on it, on the floor mind you, and put up with it. This morning my hand went numb when I moved my wrist. It jerked strangely when I moved it and it was impossible to turn it palm-up. I asked my father to look at it since he's a nurse, and he drove me to the hospital where an x-ray revealed a fracture on one side and a buckled bone on the other. In short: I have a broken wrist. I'm in a sling with a splint at the moment. Once it stops swelling, I'll have to get a cast on it.

So, guess what? I don't get to do recital. Crushed is an understatement. I wanted to do this so bad...I've never missed a recital yet. I cried on the way home from the hospital. There were alot of people coming or wanting to see it via DVD. And now I've let them all down. If it weren't for the Skittles I'm currently eating, I'd say I hate my life right now. To anybody reading this that I let down, I'm sorry.

Here's To Peace, Love, & Not Doing The Limbo On Roller Skates,
~Lola

Flying Pigs Have Been Spotted Across The US

If you misspell “swine flu”, it comes out “swine flew” and that, dear readers, is how rumors spread.

But this is not about ungulates defying gravity.

This is about learning to deal with whatever comes your way. In this case, it’s dealing with our entire state being forced to cancel public gatherings for the next 5 days due to a certain flu. No church, no public parties, no ballet… The church I can do without this week, seeing as how I’m in the process of finding a new church anyway. The ballet…well…can’t really do without that since there are only two weeks until showcase. Not that I care. I know my parts well enough for now, so let’s just say I can go without that too. That leaves the parties. And that poses a problem. Remember when my friends wanted to take me to The Rainbo Palace for a birthday surprise? That’s tomorrow. And the lockdown lasts 5 days. So, of course, my mother is relatively crushed since she planned it all and I’m wondering what I’m going to do with 9 copies of a mix CD that were supposed to be given out to all the guests. I can’t say I’m not disappointed too. It’s rare that any friends I have ever get to know me, and I won’t have these ones for much longer, so this was going to be the way to end it all with a bang. And now here is where the “learning to deal with whatever comes your way” comes in. I have two options in this situation. 1] Sit in my room staring at the wall tomorrow wishing it worked out. Or 2] Pick up a few of the ex-guests and play the 9 copies of the mix CD while we all stare at the wall together. They might both sound boring, but at least with Option 2, there’ll still be a chance of something fun. Who knows, maybe we can make our own Rainbo Palace. … Okay, no, on second thought, I don’t want unicorns painted on my wall.

ANYWAY, for those who don’t really want to hear about my life and just want to get to the moral of the story here: when things don’t turn out right, you always have two options. The first is always to let the bad times get the best of you and mope all alone. The second is to do what you can to make it work a different way. To quote Miley Cyrus (which is a one-time thing that I will later swear I never did) “life’s what you make it, so let’s make it rock!”

Here’s to Peace, Love, & Not Letting The Turkeys Swine Flu Get You Down
~Lola

Well Today Isn't Fun

I woke up feeling like a freight train hit me. My bedroom was being de-spiderized, so I camped out on a mattress on my parents' floor. Well, my dad's in Vegas for a conference so I figured I'd spend the day hanging out with my mom. Bad idea. I pulled some frozen waffles out of the freezer and put them in the oven. I set the timer for 5 minutes so I could flip them over and went to find a jacket. Buried in the closet, I didn't hear the timer go off and the waffles got a little too toasty. Well Mom went all "WIRE HANGERS!!!" on me and said I'll never grow up or be worth anything. So now I'm worthless, immature, and I've been hit by a freight train. Nice. So now I'm sitting in my room again, wiping at a few tears, drinking spice chai, wiating for my dad's plane to get in, wishing I was anywhere in the world right now but here.

On a positive note, Matt Thiessen got a Twitter.

Here's to Peace, Love & Frozen Waffles,
~ Lola

The One Thing Everybody Needs

I saw a commercial today for Mighty Mend. Billy Mays was forcefully telling me that Mighty Mend, a fabric glue said to withhold up to 100 MPH wind speeds, was the one item everybody needs. Unconvinced, I changed the channel to Good Eats - a little less loud and a little more beneficial to knowledge. But what the obnoxious spokesperson said got me thinking. What really is the one thing everybody needs? If you ask a salesman, he will say his product, whatever it may be. If you ask an atheist, he will say oxygen. If you ask a Christian, he will say God.

Now, don't get me wrong, God is definitely what everybody needs, but God isn't necessarily a thing (He is a person and a supernatural being, to be exact)

The one thing that every person in the world needs is love. It's what keeps families from falling apart during the hard times. It's what makes friends never forget eachother. It's what makes the unnoticed act out. It's what makes a society survive.

There are so many different kinds of love that it's hard to narrow it down to just one. There's the love that God feels for us, that so often is taken for granted. There's the love of a parent to a child and the reciprocated love from the child to the parent. There's the love of two people who were made for eachother. And there's the love between friends who care more for eachother than often is said.

I want to write about the last kind because so often it goes unnoticed and so often it's what is needed most. When something goes wrong in life, many times things could be so much better if we were reminded by someone that we do mean something. That there is another person in our life who cares about us. Things could be so much better with nothing more than a hug in the hallway or a reminder that they're thinking of you. So many times people are too shy or too busy to remember, but to someone, one small action could brighten a rainy day. I know I've felt that way so many times.

So don't be afraid to show someone the one thing that everybody needs today. And no, I don't mean Mighty Mend.

Here's To Peace, Love, & Being Sure You Show It
~ Lola

PJ/'s Post

I know that this blog is supposed to be about me, but today's blog is about one of the most amazing people in my life. He's been my best friend for almost two years now. Though I've never gotten to hear the sound of his voice when he laughs or watch him smile except from the other side of a computer screen, he's never once lied to me or let me down. We've shared the deepest conversations, talked about the stupidest things, experienced our fair share of awkward moments, and had the most wonderful times. He's changed my life for the better, and he's much more of a friend than I could ever deserve.

Today he's another year older. As he begins a new chapter in his life, I pray that this one is filled with adventures, happiness, and hope as his life continues to reflect God's love to all who have the privilege of knowing him.

Since I do believe, he's my only reader, I bet you didn't think I could get any mushier, but I did. I love you and hope you have a wonderful birthday, PJ/.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Forever Friends
~Lola

Starting Over

Lately, I've been spending more time in prayer, and I feel like maybe God's trying to tell me something, but I couldn't quite place what that something was - until this morning. I awoke for no reason at 5; finding myself unable to sleep, I pulled back one of the curtains in my bedroom and watched the sunrise over the treetops in the front yard. That's when it hit me. Endings can be happy and great, but sometimes it's the beginning that's beautiful. Think about the word "beginning" and what comes to mind? For me, the word brings thoughts of hope, new life, and the chance for something wonderful.

Throughout the day, it's as if God flipped the lightswitch on. The Weather Channel predicted "the start of a beautiful spring." I had the chance to pic out fabric for "the beginning of a fun summer project." My dad officially "began his role" on the local jury (sure, that's not amazing but it helped to get the point across to me.) I am sure I heard the words "beginning" "start" and "new" a thousand times today. But maybe it's not the world that's suddenly different - maybe it's God trying to change my perspective to a more hopeful outlook. Either way, I've made up my mind that the past is behind. I'm starting over for the last time,and I don't know how it will turn out, but I have the feeling that this beautiful beginningmight finally reach a happy end.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Starting Over,
~Lola

Does This Qualify As "Good" News?

This morning I was pondering the phrase "good news" and came to the conclusion that there is no such thing. Now, I'm not being hopeless and saying that all news is bad. What I mean is, in order to be a silver lining, there has to be a cloud; being one of the "cup is half empty" people, I tend to see the cloud first.

For example, today my dance instructor informed us that we've completed 8 minutes of choreography to Vivaldi's Summer. She said it's wonderful news! So wonderful, in fact, that we can go ahead and show off and do the whole dance! My group was ecstatic. But to me, that "good news" meant 4 more minutes of choreography to learn in one Saturday that I will most likely not be there.

In another example, Relient K didn't post their weekly webcast yesterday as they said they would. I was a bit disheartened as I waited till midnight to see if it was just late. (not like it's that big of a deal since John Warne might not be in it anyway...) But one of the band members blogged that it was because they were so busy making the new album more amazing than the last. But I first noticed the cloud again.

However, if you caught onto this, the silver lining is always far brighter than the road block it's hiding behind. So maybe we should try our hardest to look at that instead of the looming clouds. Because I know I'd much rather have another "FiveScore" than a third video blog posted on schedule.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Finding The Bright Side
~Lola

I Promise, I Didn't Forget About You

I'm sorry I left you. Things got a little ippy around here, so I didn't have a chance to update you. I can't say nothing's happened.

The seventh was my birthday. I got a Relient K cake, which of course is completely amazing in every possible way. I also got a Relient K book for my guitar. And a wacom tablet. I should have fun with that.

Yesterday I got a Thousand Foot Krutch T-shirt. Which is cool. Now I'm set on what to wear to Ignite in Chicago.

In other news, tomorrow is my best friend's cat's birthday. I don't know what to put on his card. Maybe something witty about cat's pajamas or something. Even though I used that on a sig I made him last year. Oh well.

And now that I've talked about everything non-important, I need to tell you the reason why I'm sorta depressed at the moment. See, last night I was thinking over Easter and how much it means and I made a promise to God that I'd stop myself from thinking lustful thoughts that I've been struggling with for over two years now. I've promised God so many times, and I've broken it every time, but last night I really thought I could keep it this time. But it wasn't even 24 hours before another promise fell through. And I feel like I've messed up too many times, fallen too far that God stopped listening and doesn't even want to hear it again...gives me this hopeless feeling of being far from everthing and I don't know what to do about it.

Sorry I burdened y'all down with that. It's just a big problem in my life right now and even if nobody reads this, it makes me feel better to say it to someone because up until now, nobody's ever known about any of this except my best friend and I never really explained it even to him.

So Here's To Peace, Love, & Trying To Find A Way Home...=(
~Lola

Let's Go To Candy Mountain, Lola...

Greetings from the end of the world.

Tuesday is my birthday. I already received $75 from one set of my grandparents. I intend to go spend it tomorrow night on a fancy Chinese dinner in the nearest big city. Should be fun. And then I get to come home and be reminded that I live in the middle of nowhere. For example:

I was at ballet last night and mentioned wanting to hang out with some of the other dancers over my birthday. Their only suggestion for nearby activities was that we go roller skating at the only rink for 50 miles - The Rainbo Palace. Firstly, they need to spell it right... Secondly, I've been in there. The walls are painted light blue with rainbows and a big castle. All it lacks are the unicorns. On second thought, I think they have one of those too. The floor has large uneven cracks all over it. And then there's the music. It's literally not been updated since the rink's opening in 1983. I suppose it's better than nothing though, since there literally is nothing else. But I'll stop complaining; at least I know I won't live here forever...

On a different note, I had a lovely opportunity today. Having nothing better to do, I watched my brother's science class dissect a (very large) grasshopper. For some odd reason it brought Mr. Miyagi to mind....anyway, the experience goes on my list of "most disturbing experiences ever" along with all the other dissections I had to watch for school.

Since tomorrow is completely free until evening, I think I'll stay up extra late tonight. Maybe watch my favorite three movies (Shall We Dance, The Importance of Being Earnest, and National Treasure if that gives you any glance into my taste in humor). Maybe it can help discourage dreams of grasshopper intestines and unicorns.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Magical Leopleurodons
~Lola

Post Script: I took a Lord of the Rings quiz today which said I am Samwise Gamgee. Not that that's even remotely related or important to this post.

Back To The Crossword Puzzling Days

"You know someone's a ballerina if their houses are cluttered with bobby pins"

That quote, like, every other seemingly derogatory comment about ballerinas, is completely correct. As I scrambled around my house this morning to get ready for ballet, it occurred to me that I had picked up a bobby pin from the office bookshelf, one from the windowsill in the dining room, and one from inside my guitar case. As I pulled the last necessary pin from my jewelry box, I checked to make sure I'd gotten everything together. Legwarmers, underall, pointe shoes, my 30GB Zune, and my cell phone. I then checked my watch and was on my way out the door, foregoing breakfast for time reasons, when I was reminded that class was rescheduled for two hours later today. I took a moment to take a breath before noticing just how scrambled my schedule has honestly been lately. It seems like I'm juggling and about to drop one of the pointy objects currently being tossed through the air. During my two hours of having absolutely nothing to do, I decided to drag up an old project from the depths - my old crossword puzzle. Not solving it, but creating it. It's the crowning achievement of my Nintendo obsession; it's the 25 original Smashers' names going down, with the names of the newcomers going across. As I sat and worked, I found I was able to enjoy myself much more than I have in a long time.

At the end of the day, I've come to the solution that the busyness of life is what makes ballerinas scatter their bobby pins across the house. Never any time to put everything away, never any time to do the things that need done. But that's why everybody needs an hour or two to themselves. Who knows, maybe I'll finish my crossword puzzle next time!

Here's to Peace, Love, and Taking A Breath Every Once In A While
~Lola

This dying world, You brought it back to life...

As predicted, my sore throat has indeed turned into a flu. I can't breathe very well, I definitely can't speak, and any glimpse of food makes me immensely thankful for my little trash bucket tucked behind my bed. I'm wandering around the house in a state relative to being a ghost.

And yet -

I feel the need to escape the house for a few kartwheels. Why? Because yesterday began a trend of absolutely perfect days. The sun is blanketing our little pocket of earth with a blissful 73 degrees, the last patches of snow hidden from it's rays. The grass is slowly returning to it's green state. There's even a slight breeze dancing through the leaves still scattered from fall.

It's interesting to note the contrast of the perfection outside and the dullness inside. As long as I'm trapped in gloomy dimness, I'd much rather curl up and stare at the wall; but one glance outside reminds me that it's far too beautiful to not smile. So, I think I might sneak out to the porch after lunch. Who knows - maybe my sunburn from yesterday will turn out in a nice tan after today.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Not Letting The Doldrums Get You Down,
~ Lola

The Pointe Shoe Philosophy

balance [bal-uhns] – noun
1. A state of equilibrium created by equal distribution of weight

Bloch Balances [block bal-uhns-ays] – noun (pl.)
1. Pointe shoes created for the express purpose of maintaining said state

Funny how if we love something, we'll ignore the pain no matter how badly it hurts. I came to this conclusion today as I donned new pointe shoes. Well, they're not exactly new. I had this style once before. I just purchased a new pair because my old ones officially died. I used those shoes for 3 hours straight today. To not be disturbing in relating the consequences, I'll simply say that we're officially out of band-aids after getting a new box only 3 days ago.

The same basic principle can be applied to all areas of life. Take friendship, for example. Friends can hurt. They can lie to you, they can stab you in the back, they can say terrible things without thinking - most of the time, without any knowledge of what they're doing to you. But if you truly love your friend, the pain won't even cross your mind (or if it does, it's suppressed before it can reach the sensitive nerve endings in the heart)

In the same way that I'm hobbling my way through the house, band-aids sticking to the insides of my fuzzy slippers, life too will move on soon enough. It might start out awkwardly and slightly uneven, but bit by bit things will adjust until the pain isn't even there anymore.

I intended this blog to complain about my new shoes, but I think maybe my rambling stumbled upon something a bit deeper. A bit more important. Maybe it can help someone out there who's dealing with a bit of hurt from someone.

Here's to Peace, Love, & Maintaining Equilibrium
~ Lola

Ahh, Tea.

I woke up this morning with one of those premonitions that the dull ache in my throat is bound to turn into something worse. But the show must go on, nonetheless. So here I sit, a cup of peppermint chamomile next to me, watching the snow drift down outside my bedroom window. The heavy clouds have turned the world outside to grey. It's 39 degrees today; the snow is less like snow and more like little packets of slush tossing themselves to the earth in swirling circles.

I'm so ready for spring. Ready for the flowers and the sunshine. Ready for the rabbits and the robins to come back. Ready for that feeling of another year waking up from its dormant sleep. Soon enough, I suppose, it will be here again.

Until then I'll just sip at my tea.

In the words of Wordsworth:
"For oft, when on my couch I lie in vacant or in pensive mood, they flash upon that inward eye which is the bliss of solitude; and then my heart with pleasure fills, and dances with the daffodils." (from 'I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud' - a very lovely poem which I suggest reading)

Here's to Peace, Love, & Hopeful Thinking
~Lola

I Thought The Solar System Was Heliocentric...

"You can know someone's a ballerina if they can only count to 8 in French."

That is 100% true. In my 12 years of ballet training, the only French numbers I know are 1-8.
un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit
But I'm not writing this to reminisce the kindergarten days of learning numbers. This entry is for those of us to are forced to co-exist with "them" - the drama queens, prima donnas, and 52-year-old 'has-been's who are still convinced that the sun and the moon and the stars and the earth all chose them as the center of gravity. Come on, we all know one. Whether it's a co-worker, neighbor, "friend", cheerleader sitting behind you in Physics, or ballet instructor *cough*, they're present everywhere. What's worse is that they seek out those of us living normal, unnassuming lives. For those of you out there reading this who are one of "them" - STOP IT. The world does, in fact, still revolve around the sun. For those of you reading this who have to put up with a "her" (or "him", be it your case) there really is nothing we can do but shut our own mouths and block them out. Nothing they say will ever be about us anyway since we are merely another satellite in their self-sustained solar systems. Ignore what they say and soon enough they'll stop seeking you out on their own.

Tonight I'll go to ballet, and not listen to a word of what the instructor says. Why do you think I taught myself how to count in French?

Here's to Peace, Love, & Nicolaus Copernicus
~Lola

Nice To Meet You.

Welcome to my little corner of cyberspace. If you're reading this, chances are you don't know me. I'll give you a few basic facts. You'll be able to infer the rest.

1. My favorite colors are black, green, purple, and blue.
2. My favorite bands are Relient K, Thousand Foot Krutch, Family Force 5, Hawk Nelson, and FM Static. Expect it to change. It always does.
3. I play the guitar, xylophone, piano, and flute.
4. I am over the age of 10. How much older, you'll have to just guess. (note: I'm not 20. Yet.)
5. Oh, and I am a girl. In case you couldn't tell by how I write.

Good? Good. My life...is relatively boring. Small towns are ridiculous. Every once in a while things get fun, however. Be it a concert or a trip with some friends or just anything to get away. Expect reflections on here. But I'll attempt to make this fun & not quite so cynical as my outlook on life. I can't promise this thing will live. Heck, it'd be harder to promise this thing won't die. But I guess I'll try my best.

Here's to Peace, Love, & New Beginnings.
~ Lola